Get well soon

Again, i admit how such a loser i'm being. Again, i'm gonna use the abscence of my nerves as my excuse for not saying this in front of you.

I really hope you're alright.

And did you know not saying this brought you into my dream (AGAIN) last night? It's one of those times all over again. 

"Suck it and see,
you never know.
Sit next to me,
before I go...

Blue moon girls from once upon a Shangri-La

How I often wonder where you are

You have got that face that just says
"Baby, I was made to break your heart""

damn these awful traits i have

Do you know what it feels like to not be able to look into other people's eyes? That's exactly why I always avoid eye contacts at all possible times.

Do you know what it feels like to not have any idea how to talk to someone even though you really really want to? Do you know what it feels like to be really shitty at small talks? That's exactly why some people find me really quiet sometimes.

Do you know what it feels like to be uncomfortable in the crowd? Even worse, when you have to be on stage in front of many people.

Do you even have that anxiety EVERYTIME you have to talk to someone new? Even worse when you have to initiate the talk for the first time.

I swear I've felt this way for as long as I can remember. Even since I was a little kid. All my life.

You don't have any idea how hard it is.

I know I'm not a psychology expert per se but I'm pretty sure this is all because of my introvert blood... and I find it EXTREMELY annoying sometimes. It sucks.

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